SELF CARE TALK
Let me tell you a little story about a girl who said NO — not just no, but no way, 7 years ago to an opportunity. It is almost always my go-to response, no. I don’t want to, I don’t have time, I don’t want more responsibility, but the mental transition from my instinctive “no” to “yes” really taught me a lot about how essential it is to make time for myself, invest in myself. As a mom of three, including twins and a medically-dependent child, the importance of doing something for myself, and having something of my own was needed now more than ever.
MY STORY
At this particular time in my life, I had an 8 month old, so I was even more crazy than normal. We had an incredibly hard three years between both the twins requiring multiple surgeries, new diagnosis, in and out of hospitals, including Hayes being in PICU for a month. My mom was basically living with us to help, especially while I was on bed-rest for 4 months with Brenham. It was a wild ride y’all trying to settle into our new normal. I was in survival mode, living off pure prayer and adrenaline. Anyone who has kids can testify to those early days…years…of insomnia and cluelessness — now add having multiples with special needs. I was worn down. Attempting to navigate this new world was overwhelming. I felt like I was being pulled in every direction just to try and keep up with it all mentally and physically. Not to mention the pressure we put on ourselves to be a good mom, wife, friend, maid, chef, etc is crazy. That feeling of giving and giving and not having anything of your own, just running on empty. I mean, even my own body didn’t feel like mine anymore — it sure didn’t look like it. I was a freakin’ milk machine and a jungle gym, for the kids and husband. #realtalk I felt like a shell of what I used to be, slowly cracking. You get the picture. Maybe you’ve been there before. The thought of adding anything else to my plate made my head spin.
So, when a dear friend approached me about starting my own business with Rodan+Fields, I thought she had lost her damn mind, to put it lightly. I mean, I was all for good skin care having been on Accutane twice, but I had already tried it all and been to all the “parties” along the way. But, like a good friend, I accepted a sample — and like a crap friend, I didn’t use it for months. lol Maybe because secretly I knew once I tried it I would be hooked and I didn’t want to invest — didn’t think I could justify using the time or money on myself. Anyone hear me on that? How many times do we put ourselves on the backburner for one reason or another, knowing we are in need. I was looking at it all wrong. Had I taken the time to listen and put away my assumptions, I would have seen the gift that was being offered to me. The opportunity to invest in myself. The opportunity to have something of my own that would benefit not only me, but my family and others.
You can say what you want about “direct sales” companies because they’ve gotten a bad rap…most deservingly so…and chances are I’ve thought and said the exact things you may be thinking. I’d seen it all, heard it all, and wanted no part of it. So, I prayed, I researched and I prayed some more. Could this really be the open door I needed to take a chance on me, for me? To join the creators of ProActiv, two of the world’s leading dermatologist in creating the nations #1 premium skincare brand — on my time and my terms. At this point, I really had nothing to lose, with the credibility of the doctors behind me and a 60 day money back guarantee. When a company is making the majority of their revenue (over 75%) from their product, not just gaining new consultants, I’d say they’re doing something right. The foundation of RF is their skincare products and they revolutionized the industry. I truly believe their main goal is to change skin and change lives. And in the strangest and most unexpected ways, that’s exactly what it’s done for me. All because I took a leap of faith to invest in myself.
Was it scary? Absolutely. I was in the first-time-zone. Check out Brene Brown’s Podcast Unlocking Us, on FFT’s. There is some great insight on how to deal with being in a new and vulnerable situation. How I moved forward in this business, in this investment, was going to look different than someone else. That was the beauty of this opportunity though. I had to set some realistic expectations for myself to accommodate my responsibilities at home still. But this was my way to contribute and an outlet for me.
It was my time to take a big step and maybe it’s yours too, but the baby steps of self-care are just as important. Remember, you aren’t going to be any good to anyone if you don’t take care of yourself. So, here are some ways how you can help preserve, improve, or revive your mental, spiritual and physical well being.
SELF CARE IDEAS — BIG AND SMALL
BUBBLE BATH – Take a bubble bath, or just a bath. Add your favorite scent with a candle or 10, bath salts or bubbles.
READ A BOOK – Find a good book to get lost in, escape reality. I’ve mentioned previously my new found love for reading, mostly fiction. Check out my list here of 12 Books of 2020.
FIND A TV SERIES – This might be shocking, but you and your spouse may have different taste in shows — what?!?! As much as I love watching the History Channel, PBS and every sports channel known to man, I do enjoy other genres. Watch the movie you’ve been wanting to see, start or rewatch a favorite series. My go to’s are New Girl, Parks and Recreation, or The Office. Always good for a laugh.
GO FOR A RUN or WALK – Take 30 min to get outside, get your body moving. My love-hate relationship with running is real, but I am always glad it did it. Reference my I hate Running thoughts in my first blog.
ESSENTIAL OILS – I’m not a crazy essential oil person, but there are a few I really enjoy and always have on hand. Even my kids like the roll-ons or putting them in the diffuser at night. I love mixing lavender, peppermint and lemon — helps with allergies too.
INVEST IN YOUR SKIN – This is obviously an important one to me, but invest in good skincare. It pains me to think about all the money I spent trying products that didn’t work and didn’t have a money back guarantee. I mean, I wouldn’t just keep buying clothes that didn’t fit and not return them. Why would I do that with my face? Check out some of my favorite products.
UPGRADE BEDTIME ROUTINE – I have always been a terrible sleeper, but I love to sleep. It’s a bad combination. I’ve tried a lot of things but here is what seems to be helping me relax — for now. Try a good Scented Heating Pad. Take care of those hands and feet…my favorite lotion I use every night is this Sweet Mamas Relief Lotion from a local spa, Natures Beauty Spa. Don’t forget about those essential oils, too. Get a new pillow. It’s one of those things you don’t really want to spend money on, but do it. You’ll be glad you did.
DEVOTIONAL – Start small if you need to, 5 minutes, but take time each day to invest spiritually. Dedicating that little bit of time can make a big difference. It should be a top priority — I’m preaching to myself here too. The Bible App is a great option for free devotional plans. They have lots of catagorites like: love, fear, anxiety, hope, etc. to chose from, and you can set a daily reminder right in the app. The app is free and the plans are free. Here is a 7-day plan I enjoyed so much I bought the book. The Habit Breaker devotional plan
TREAT YO SELF – Go get a massage, get a pedicure or manicure. Get dressed up and go to brunch, dinner or somewhere with your spouse or friends. Buy the shoes, the bag, the earrings you’ve been watching for months. Get the nice bottle of wine, you know, the one on the top shelf at the grocery store, lol. Do something once a month, once a quarter, you normally wouldn’t do for yourself. Here’s the kicker — don’t feel guilty about it either.
I could go on with more ideas, but I hope these get you thinking. How can you invest in yourself? Are you at a place in your life where it’s time to take a leap of faith or just a step. Sometimes that’s the hardest part, but you have to get out of your own head. Allow yourself to invest in you, guilt free because you are worth it. Self-care looks different for everyone. Whether it’s taking baby steps to take care of yourself or a total leap of faith, the moral of the story is to invest in yourself. I bet in the process you’ll discover your faith overcoming your fear.
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How did you get so wise ? Love to read your thoughts, words and wisdom ❤️
I had great examples of selfless, humble women who cared hard and worked hard, but also showed me the importance of not neglecting yourself, but investing in yourself 🥰🥰
How did you get so wise ? Love to read your thoughts, words and wisdom ❤️
The simple purchase a pillow can make the difference in your sleep – again the little things you always share are practical and something I can easily implement. I need to remember to invest in my self!